A Day In The Life
Sun ,14/03/2010I wake up early in the morning. Like, ridiculously early. I’m usually up by at LEAST 5am, though 3:30-4:00am are becoming increasingly more common. I spend a little while stretching in bed and acclimating to consciousness. The feeling of stretching sleepy muscles under the covers with a great big yawn is delicious, and a little thing I really enjoy about my mornings. From there, I’ll usually hop on the computer, check Facebook and blogs… sometimes I’m chatty, sometimes I just read. As the light starts to come in, I bring everything downstairs, make myself coffee, and take some time to greet the sunrise. The warm and bitter taste of strong, black coffee on a chilly morning, with the clouds and sky a riot of vibrant colors on the horizon is another great pleasure in my life.
I’ll sit at my table, with my little netbook and my cup of coffee, and job hunt, and lately, work on my “work-at-home” job. It’s not going to be enough, there’s really not enough work right now in it. Still, the feeling of warm air blowing across my cold feet from the heat register underneath the table, the blooming warmth of the coffee and caffeine blossoming inside me, the sounds of birds chirping outside my window, feeling safe and secure and productive in the morning … that’s nice. Some mornings, at this point, I’ll fire up the stove, and make eggs. I love eggs. I’ll fry them, scramble them, sometimes I’ll even make breakfast burritos. There is no greater comfort food for me in the morning then one of my “signature” breakfast burritos. A full belly is a wonderful gift to myself.
Usually, around this point, I want to do yoga, but I then realize I’m FAR too full. So it’s back to the computer, checking in on Facebook as the world is finally waking up. You gotta love the one line, sometimes witty blurbs, and interesting news articles the people who have been in your life at some point have to share. It’s cheap, social entertainment. Some days after this, I’ll watch a movie, or pick up my cross stitching, and sit in quiet contemplation. I do love my cross stitching. It’s very calm, very zen. This is usually my go to for peace and relaxation. And the peace and calm and comfort from this get tied into every stitch, forming a work of art charged with that intent. Very nice.
After a couple hours of quietly stitching, the urge for yoga is strong. I haven’t been keeping up a very vigorous practice of late, instead just doing a gentle flow with long holds, or Surya Namaskara A and B. Enought to stretch and lengthen the muscles, wake up my body, and allow me to sink a little deeper towards myself. A little time after this is spent journaling about my practice, and then it’s off to the shower. I’m not sure which is more beautiful… the feeling of my muscles during and after yoga, or the cascade of hot water on my body afterwards. Both are ecstatically sensual.
That is how I start each day. What happens next varies from day to day. I like to leave room for spontaneity in my life. Lately though, I’ll go next door and visit with my neighbors, play some games, work more, cross stitch more, or go on super long walks in the woods. Anyway you look at it, these are all things I really enjoy doing. Especially the walks in the woods. I don’t care how many times I’ve walked the same trails, every day is a little different. The woods are alive, vibrant, changing, and more importantly, I can notice and feel this. Spending time worshipping in a cold building may be fine for some, but I tend to find Deity working most strongly and showing itself more noticeably in nature, and every step, every observation, every inhale of sweet clean air, every touch of a tree, every moment spent standing face to face with a deer and locking eyes .. these are moments of worship that make my spirit full and thankful.
I spend a lot of the evening thinking, sometimes hard and heavy thoughts, sometimes light and airy, sometimes working through facts and logic, other times emotional and abstract. Or my nose will be buried in a book, seeking to broaden my horizons, or devouring a favorite story for the 500th time. I like giving my intellect a workout.
So yes… my life has been filled with silence lately. And when my kids aren’t here, I get terribly lonely and struggle. But never think for a moment, that because I’m sad about this, that I am not living my life. I’m living my life, and living it up. I know it’s not really the life of excess and debauch one would expect, and it might not be exciting to some, but it’s a life that I find suits me for now. I find happiness in what I do, and nobody should expect more from me than that. While I wish things could be a bit different in some regards, this is what *I* have to work with, and believe me, I am working it.